PRIDE & PREJUDICE: JANE AUSTEN: CHAPTER THIRTY SIX

Darcy's letter did not contain a renewal of his offers. Elizabeth did not have any expectation either. But as she went through the letter eagerly, conflicting emotions passed through her.  His views on Jane's insensitivity towards Mr Bingley is false. Darcy's account of Mr Wickham surprisingly agree with what the latter himself had given.  This agreement very much astonished Elizabeth.  In this perturbed state of mind, with thoughts that could rest on nothing, she walked on; but it would not do.  In half a minute the letter was unfolded again, and she began the mortifying perusal of all that related to Mr Wickham.  The account of his connection with Pemberly family was exactly what he had related himself; the kindness of the late Mr Darcy, agreed equally with his own words.  But in the case of the will related to living there was a duplicity on one side or other.  But, of his designs on Miss Darcy, ( Georgina) received some confirmation from what had passed between Colonel Fitzwilliam and herself.

She perfectly remembered everything that had passed in conversation with Mr Wickham and herself, in their first evening at Mr Phillips's.  Many of his expressions were still fresh in her memory.  She was now struck with the impropriety of such communication to a stranger, and wondered it had escaped her notice.  She saw the indelicacy of putting himself forward, and the inconsistency of his professions with his conduct.  She remembered that he had boasted of having no fear of seeing Mr Darcy - that Mr Darcy might leave the country, but that he should stand his ground; yet he avoided the Netherfield ball the very next week. She remembered that, till the Netherfield family quitted the country, he had told his story to none but herself, but that after their removal, it had been everywhere discussed.

How differently did everything now appear in which he was concerned!  His attentions to Miss King was his attempt to grasp her mediocre fortune.  Every lingering struggle in his favour grew fainter and fainter, and in far justification of Mr Darcy. She began to see Mr Darcy in a new light, though with all his deficiencies.  She grew absolutely ashamed of herself. She had been blind, partial and prejudiced.

"How despicably I have acted!" she cried, "I, who have prided myself on my discernment!  I, who have valued myself on my abilities!"

The compliment to herself and her sister was not unfelt.  It soothed, but it could not console her for the contempt of the family.

After wandering along the lane for around two hours, giving way to a variety of thoughts, she returned home.  She was immediately informed that two gentlemen from Rosings had each called in her absence.

THE END

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